What kills your motivation?

Discussion in 'About Success, Motivation & Goal Setting' started by Motivation Mob, Sep 19, 2017.

  1. Motivation Mob

    Motivation Mob New Member

    Motivation is a lie... I dont mean that it doesn't exist, what I mean is that what we are often told about motivation is a lie. Let me explain.

    I told my friends I would lose 20lbs and they laughed at me. They were not laughing when they saw me two months later. You see, I have always had a tendency towards being a little heavier than my friends. One night, when a group of us went out for dinner, I proclaimed as I always have that I will lose weight. Looking back now, I can understand why they would laugh at me. I told them I would lose weight while my face was covered in the sauce from the half a chicken I had just devoured. If I could travel back in time, I think I would have laughed at myself, but at the time, I felt humiliated and angry.

    As I lay in my bed that night, unable to fall asleep, I thought back to all the times I had tried to lose weight only to fall into my bad habits before reaching my goal. I made two important realizations:
    1. I cannot directly control how much weight I can lose...
    2. I can directly control how much effort I can put in towards reaching my goal.
    In other words, my end goal of losing 20lbs, although being important, was not as important as the actual process of losing the weight. Having examined my own life, I have found, and continue to find that I lack motivation in the areas where my focus is on the goal and not the process. As soon as I divorce myself from the outcome, and focus solely on the process, I find it easier to maintain motivation.

    What I mean by focusing on the process is that you should define what you need to do in as much detail as possible. Acknowledge that you have control over how and when you do it. Then do it all with 100% effort. Realize that although the goal is important to you, it may not be in your direct control, and that even if you dont reach your goal, you did everything you could. I dont know about you.

    I put all of my focus on eating healthy and on time, as well as getting enough exersise and in 2 months, I lost the extra weight. It was not easy in the beginning, but by making the process a part of my daily routine, I began to feel guilty when I skipped a workout or if I didnt eat right.

    The big motivation lie is that you dont need it, provided you:
    1. Focus on the processes and not the desired outcome, and
    2. Make each step of the process a part of your normal routine.
    I made it a routine by using the if/when-this-then-that approach. For example, when I wake up, I go for a 20 minute jog. When I return from my jog I have breakfast. If I skip my morning jog, I will walk to work. After a while, you will find that when your if/when happens and you dont do your then-that, you will not feel right until you do it.

    Perhaps I am just odd, but it's what works for me.

    What kills your motivation and how do you get it back?

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    Last edited: Sep 19, 2017
  2. Abhijeet Nalavade

    Abhijeet Nalavade New Member

    negative thoughts
     
  3. shohrat shankar

    shohrat shankar Life Empowerment Coach and Facilitator

    the biggest enemy between us and our success is our self.
    No outside things matter.
     
  4. srirama123

    srirama123 Business Motivational Speakers in India

    Hii
    There some habits which kills your motivation such as You desire to be perfect, You compare yourself with others, You don't believe in yourself etc.
     
  5. shohrat shankar

    shohrat shankar Life Empowerment Coach and Facilitator

    What?
    Your desire to be perfect?
    Are you serious?
     
  6. Anthony D

    Anthony D Sharing My Journey Of Discovery And Life Lessons

    Nothing will kill motivation faster than doing things that are not aligned with your values.

    When you are aligned with your values and your vision you become "INSPIRED".
     
  7. srirama123

    srirama123 Business Motivational Speakers in India

    Thank you for sharing your views
     
  8. MikeJ

    MikeJ New Member

    I was working for 5 years as maths tutor in Adelaide and I noticed that almost 70-80% of times, pupils were losing their motivation in case of first difficult or "not easy understandable" task. That's a very big problem I think and it can be mapped to many other things which will be correct not only for kids and young students.
     

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